Jordan Eisenberg, a 28 year old entrepreneur living in Denver, invented PMS Buddy, “a free Internet-based service that tracks the monthly cycles of a subscriber’s significant other and offers e-mail reminders about the impending deadlines.” (Major eyeroll.)
As the website says:
PMS – premenstrual syndrome – can be a difficult time of the month for many women and those close to them. Since discussing PMS is not exactly welcomed dinner table conversation, and may lead to dinner plates being hurled across the room, we want to take the unexpectedness out of this recurring occurrence so that those affected by PMS can be prepared and aware.
Eisenberg says that after growing up around women, he knows how difficult it can be fore men to deal with the “volatile emotions” of PMS. PMS… you know, it transforms us into even more of an emotional mess than we normally are. All those raging hormones make us more unreasonable than usual.
Which is why Eisenberg so cleverly created PMS Buddy whose slogan is “Saving relationships one month at a time.” Men, now you’ll know precisely when to steer clear of your PMSing girlfriends or wives!
Here are some things Eisenberg has said:
“The whole notion [of PMS Buddy] is that you’re being considerate. Obviously, it’s funny as well.”
Apparently he thinks it’s more considerate because instead of asking women if it’s that time of the month, their significant others can just go online and check! How thoughtful! Isn’t it quite romantic, to check up on a woman’s menstrual cycle secretly without her knowing?
And somehow he finds it funny…I find it creepy, condescending, insensitive, and simply insane. It also pathologizes PMS.
“Just having that awareness [of when a woman's menstrual cycle is], we hope, will lend to fewer arguments.”
Because of course women are the only ones who are driven by their hormones. Men aren’t influenced by their hormones at all! And when women are PMS-ing, men need to lay low and get out their shields because who knows what can come their way?! And of course the way to avoid further arguments is by creepily tracking a woman’s menstrual cycle online (or on your iPhone – you can download the application for 99 cents).
Better yet, if you go on the PMS Buddy site, you will see more outrageous stuff, like PMS Stories and PMS Tips. I didn’t have the patience to look through the PMS Stories but the PMS Tips are absolutely absurd. Some tips include:
- buying her flowers, “the kryptonite to PMS” (How typical. Of course ALL women love flowers, especially while she’s PMSing!)
- scoping out other singles at match.com (Ditch your girlfriend/wife when she’s PMSing. There are other fish in the sea who aren’t PMSing.)
- buying her sexy underwear at the Playboy store because “during PMS women can feel bloated and unattractive. Show her how you really feel with some sexy lingerie”. (Ahh. Aren’t you quite the understanding, sensitive boyfriend/husband?)
Of course, if these remedies don’t work and fail to alleviate your suffering because of PMS, just remember that women are not in control of their emotions during this awful time of the month. Be gentle and understanding. And of course, use PMS Buddy! It’ll be your new BFF that’ll help you through those rocky times when it’s time for her you-know-what!