Right…aren’t men quite the expert on PMS?

24 03 2009

Jordan Eisenberg, a 28 year old entrepreneur living in Denver, invented PMS Buddy, “a free Internet-based service that tracks the monthly cycles of a subscriber’s significant other and offers e-mail reminders about the impending deadlines.” (Major eyeroll.)

As the website says:

PMSpremenstrual syndrome – can be a difficult time of the month for many women and those close to them. Since discussing PMS is not exactly welcomed dinner table conversation, and may lead to dinner plates being hurled across the room, we want to take the unexpectedness out of this recurring occurrence so that those affected by PMS can be prepared and aware.

Eisenberg says that after growing up around women, he knows how difficult it can be fore men to deal with the “volatile emotions” of PMS. PMS… you know, it transforms us into even more of an emotional mess than we normally are. All those raging hormones make us more unreasonable than usual.

Which is why Eisenberg so cleverly created PMS Buddy whose slogan is “Saving relationships one month at a time.” Men, now you’ll know precisely when to steer clear of your PMSing girlfriends or wives!

Here are some things Eisenberg has said:

“The whole notion [of PMS Buddy] is that you’re being considerate. Obviously, it’s funny as well.”

Apparently he thinks it’s more considerate because instead of asking women if it’s that time of the month, their significant others can just go online and check! How thoughtful! Isn’t it quite romantic, to check up on a woman’s menstrual cycle secretly without her knowing?

And somehow he finds it funny…I find it creepy, condescending, insensitive, and simply insane. It also pathologizes PMS.

“Just having that awareness [of when a woman’s menstrual cycle is], we hope, will lend to fewer arguments.”

Because of course women are the only ones who are driven by their hormones. Men aren’t influenced by their hormones at all! And when women are PMS-ing, men need to lay low and get out their shields because who knows what can come their way?! And of course the way to avoid further arguments is by creepily tracking a woman’s menstrual cycle online (or on your iPhone – you can download the application for 99 cents).

Better yet, if you go on the PMS Buddy site, you will see more outrageous stuff, like PMS Stories and PMS Tips. I didn’t have the patience to look through the PMS Stories but the PMS Tips are absolutely absurd. Some tips include:

– buying her flowers, “the kryptonite to PMS” (How typical. Of course ALL women love flowers, especially while she’s PMSing!)

– scoping out other singles at match.com (Ditch your girlfriend/wife when she’s PMSing. There are other fish in the sea who aren’t PMSing.)

– buying her sexy underwear at the Playboy store because “during PMS women can feel bloated and unattractive. Show her how you really feel with some sexy lingerie”. (Ahh. Aren’t you quite the understanding, sensitive boyfriend/husband?)

Of course, if these remedies don’t work and fail to alleviate your suffering because of PMS, just remember that women are not in control of their emotions during this awful time of the month. Be gentle and understanding. And of course, use PMS Buddy! It’ll be your new BFF that’ll help you through those rocky times when it’s time for her you-know-what!


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2 responses

24 03 2009
Becky

The assumption made by the website, that all women have a regular monthly cycle is also pretty absurd. Or, at least I believe they’re assuming that – I can’t find anything saying otherwise without signing up for an account. A decent sized minority of women have cycles that aren’t regular. So it’s not only ridiculous, it probably rarely works.

Also interesting: the top “pmsbuddy story”, posted “by a woman”:
“I even put pms buddy on for myself so that i will be reminded because i forget easily and now i can remember and learn to try and control myself during my hormone imbalance”

Of course she needs to control herself! She’s a forgetful, crazy lady; who knows what disaster she would cause without the warnings of pmsbuddy.

16 04 2009
Jason

As a transgender (FtM), I actually have to say, when I was a female, I turned into a raging harpy once a month. I knew it, I would go on a complete rampage over the slightest thing and I knew it was all hormonal- but that didn’t stop me being utterly furious.
And yeah, I told my partner. Warned him, actually. Because I DID turn into an irrational, incontrolable fiend for that week. I’d tell him to, well… “lay low and get out [his] shields”. It was safest for him.

I think some women (not all) think they’re perfectly rational during PMS, when they’re not. Then again, some women really ARE just as rational regardless of the time of the month, and I envied those women. The thing is, men do notice if the woman in their life suffers from hormonal moodswings, and whilst I think the whole PMSBuddy thing is, well… creepy and not very well executed, I think it would do a lot of relationships good to have the man know when the woman will be PMSing.
The issue is that many women can’t handle being honest about such a delicate subject, and don’t want to discuss it with their partners. Which, to be honest, can lend to the “PMS = crazy woman” stereotype. Such relationships would go a lot smoother if both genders could discuss their bodily functions and the crazy crazy things said functions make them do.
And if you’re sitting there thinking that PMS doesn’t make women irrational, either you’ve never lived through terrible PMS- or you’re lying to yourself.

…Speaking as someone who’s been a woman and a man.

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